Hay Fever
by IcyKali
Summary: Mojo Jojo really hates spring. One-shot, partly inspired by my awful allergies!


_A/N: This was written for Marisa Lee's Monthly Writing Contest! It had to be a thousand words or less, and the theme was FLOWER. This was also based on a PPG comic, titled "Beauty is HIM Deep." Enjoy!_

With an excruciating grinding noise, like nails on a chalkboard, the back of the telescope tore into the metal hull of Mojo Jojo's not-so-secret observatory.

"Curses!" He yelled and threw up his arms in fury. "Here is yet another irreplaceable object that I must now replace! All because I had to sneeze at precisely the wrong moment, and not at a correct and appropriate one, due to these intolerable, insufferable, and otherwise botherso—" Mojo coughed and rubbed his itchy, now more red than pink, eyes. "...seasonal allergies."

Before checking if his current finances could cover a priceless telescope (they couldn't), Mojo paused to peer out of one of his round windows to watch the people in Townsville Park.

He raised an eyebrow when he spotted a family dressed like clowns having a picnic, but then he just sneered. "Of course they would be dressed as clowns! That is exactly what they are, and those malcontented fools can have their spring! I, Mojo Jojo, do not enjoy this season, as it turns from muddy and wet to ninety-degrees in a few short weeks!" He sniffed, and noticed that a paperboy threw a paper at the bottom of his steps.

Mojo put his palm to his face and groaned. He shut off his lockdown system and began the long trek down his many stairs. A cardinal flew past and he snarled at it. By the time he reached his small moat, he was completely miserable, his eyes and head burning. All he wanted was to sit down with a towel over his head and snore.

He picked up the paper and barely made out the headline: DOZENS OF GIANT FLOWERS TAKE ROOT IN TOWNSVILLE—Mayor protests lack of petunias.

"Giant flowers?" Mojo rubbed his eyes again and looked to the city. Indeed, humongous roses, peonies, daffodils, and countless other varieties were curled around the buildings and blooming proudly.

"So that is why my allergies are acting up this year! Curse these disgusting flowers!" Mojo shook his fist at them and climbed the steps once more.

* * *

The next morning, the newspaper's headline read, "IN HONOR OF PRETTY, PRETTY, FLOWERS, MAYOR DECLARES EVERY WEEK FASHION WEEK!" Mojo spied at the citizens below him with his telescope (which had been hastily repaired with duct-tape—that can fix everything.) "I despise these people even more than I usually despise them! How dare they hurt my, Mojo Jojo's, eyes with their sparkly, bright, and otherwise garish clothing!" Mojo leapt down from his seat, and decided to get back into bed. Evil planning could wait until summer. "These 'pretty' flowers had better not be the work of that Gnome..." he muttered.

Suddenly, a bright red light flashed, and HIM appeared. He looked even more disturbingly excited than usual. "It's not the gnome this time, darling. This is my work! Isn't it just delightful?" he said in a sing-songy voice.

Mojo coughed, and then scowled at HIM. "This work of yours is not sufficiently evil, nor does it inflict pain on or endanger the citizens of Townsville! I do not see why I am meant to be impressed."

HIM frowned, and his teeth grew sharp. "Not impressed? Don't you know how much mana it takes to make roses that large?" His eyes narrowed as he looked Mojo over, and HIM's voice dropped in pitch. "What is your problem? Why are you not dressed fancy? Haven't you read the news? Even the criminals are dressed in fine suits!"

Mojo pointed accusingly at HIM. "It is you who is in possession of a problem, not I! I will not inform you that I do not enjoy spring flowers one bit, and I would gladly miss this entire, accursed season! Now please leave!"

HIM was far too shocked to be offended. "Hate spring? Spring is a force almost as powerful as me... nobody could hate it..." HIM disappeared.

* * *

Mojo clutched his pillow to his head in vain. He just couldn't sleep through the sounds of people yelling. He grudgingly got up, his blankets tangling in his cape which he hadn't bothered to take off. He walked to his front door and listened to the chattering through his microphone.

"I'm the prettiest!"

"No, I am!"

"Your look's so blasé!"

"Yours is totally passé!"

Mojo scratched his chin, as the yelling became the sounds of punching and moans of pain. "Hm. It seems that the citizens of Townsville, in their gullible and also overly malleable state have been reduced to fighting over beauty, due to the large flowers." He walked to his window, and grinned evilly as all the citizens out in the park screamed and tore at each other's clothing.

He caught a glimpse of three bright streaks of light in the sky, and saw the Powerpuff Girls punching through the offending flower stalks, and blasting them with their laser eyes. HIM stood over the buildings, probably crying about his lovelies dying, and the girls quickly cut him down after dealing with his flowers. Soon, Mojo saw a HIM-sized object flying over the city. Even for an immortal, that had to have hurt.

Mojo looked at the ground once more, as the citizens of the city snapped out of their fashion-obsessed state, and felt the pain of their bruises and wounds, their battered states being something even the Powerpuff Girls couldn't magically heal.

"Perhaps this will not be such an awful season after all..." Mojo said quietly, "and perhaps I owe a demon a drink."


End file.
